Well. Let me begin with how my day started.
5:10 am: I am up and getting ready for work, to brighten my day I listen to the Disney Pandora radio (only the classic songs of course).
5:45: Opening up at work is the worst. It's dark, scary, and I feel like someone is just going to snatch me up because i'm alone at work until the residents come in at 6:10-ish.
10:00: Hooray! I'm off of work and i'm on my way to school! I felt pretty good today at school! I wore my new skirt that i'm kind of obsessed with, i'll be sure to take pictures later, but it is fantastic! And just wearing that made me content.
ps. I also registered for classes at UVU! whoop! I'm officially a Utah Valley University student and athlete, actually I still have to sign...but I have the papers in my car!
2:45: I had track, just to add to my happiness today:) I love running so I was able to enjoy myself with my friends while doing just starts because we have a meet tomorrow!
4:30-ish: Off to see my perfect boy and his family, when my mom calls and says she scheduled me to work Sunday, when I specifically told her the prior day that I don't work Sundays. Simply because that is not my day to work, it is my dad to focus on going to church, learning about the gospel, and be with family and friends that genuinely care for me. But she said no.
And that began our little disagreement. I tried to calmly state that this is what I personally can not do. And she said things that hurt my feelings, as far as what I believe in goes. But then we started talking about the new religion I have put my faith in, and have began to love for quite some time now...and how my parents disagree with it with all their hearts...how I will never have their support, the slightest.
(this is all a conversation over the phone ps)
Finally, I arrived to my boyfriends house and kicked it with his sister. It was just me and her, and then my dad calls so I go outside and talk with him and he says a few things, simply put.
Desi i'm sick of dealing with you
I'm done with you
I want you moved out
You can quit track tomorrow, I don't care
Get a real job
and take care of yourself
5:15 pm: I was kicked out of my house.
So now my bags are all packed, and either tonight, or tomorrow, or maybe even Friday, I will be moving in with my cousin who lives in Pleasant Grove. I don't know for how long, but I don't want a lengthy stay. I don't want to live off my cousin, so I think after a few days, i'll come back home. I think both myself and my parents will have calmed down by then and we will be able to sort things out. But until then, we apparently both need our space. I'm going to miss my baby siblings the most, because they are my absolute world, and I hate the fact of not being able to see them a lot...
But at the same time, i'm at peace right now...
And I know it's because my Heavenly Father will not put me through something that I can't make it through. I will emerge from this a stronger person. And I know that I am still needing to learn so much, but the faith I have in my Heavenly Father right now is enough, and the gospel I will continue to live by and cherish is an outlet for me when I'm feeling this way. The gospel and prayer. I can not stress enough how much prayer has gotten me through the past few weeks. Especially today, It has lightened my heart and given me strength to carry on because I know that Heavenly Father is always listening and will always act. Even if it's on his own time, he still helps guide me through any darkness I shall face.
And because of Heavenly Father and His son, I am able to repent of all the wrong I feel I have done with the relationship my parents and I have, and I am able to ask for strength and the kindness in my heart to still love my parents all the same, despite what has happened to us now and in the past. I am so thankful for this gospel.
I am also so blessed for my three best friends...
My boy..Ben, of course <3
Corrie and Sara. My girls, they are always there, everyday with me by my side.
And because of them I was able to accept a lot of what has happened.
I am so blessed to have them in my life.
and my incredible boy has called me 3 times and counting today already just to make sure i'm okay and said a perfect prayer with me. I'm so so blessed.
Despite this trial, I can move forward.
Alma 32:21 "And no was I said concerning faith- faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true"
Even though my knowledge may be small right now, my faith is enough to carry me through anything.